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Overcoming Burnout with Tessa Hayman

Tessa Hayman is a RN in Canada that worked through her own burnout and is now helping other healthcare providers do the same. She has a unique perspective on burnout and how it affects all members of the team. Dealing with moral injury and vicarious trauma as causes of burnout will be points of her discussion. Tessa is very knowledgeable about what leads to burnout and her story will leave you wanting to hear more from her.

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Tessa Hayman

Tessa Hayman is a RN in Canada that specialized in palliative care. It wasn’t until after she left bedside nursing that she was able to recover from the burnout she had been dealing with. After seeking help to deal with her burnout, she moved into the coaching space to help others in healthcare that are working through issues that are negatively impacting their lives.

Tessa is part of a larger group that held a Burnout Summit. She is a speaker that advocates for healthcare wellness. The discussion surrounding learned helplessness is fascinating and as she explains what that is and how it manifests, you will shake your head yes. We have all seen it and lived it. She describes it as being in prison with the door open.

As part of Keys of Prosperity, Tessa will help you regain a sense of wellbeing. Her fight to help frontline workers get to a better place in their lives will improve the overall culture of our profession.

Learn more about supporting the Don’t Eat Your Young Podcast with a membership — visit Don’t Eat Your Young’s membership page!

About Tessa

Tessa Hayman is a registered nurse, burnout recovery specialist and coach, who has supported thousands of clients to gain the knowledge, accountability and support need to recover from burnout. She helps and guides health professionals to clear anxiety and overwhelm, learn how to manage or eliminate stress, develop daily self-care practices and create habits that stick so abundance and prosperity flow throughout all areas of life.

Tessa is determined to help health professionals around the world to thrive in a career field that otherwise constantly conditions them to burn out and live in survival mode. She has been a guest speaker on numerous podcasts, summits and events, becoming an outspoken voice constantly advocating for the health and wellbeing of her colleagues and those in a health care profession.

Links

Tessa on:
* LinkedIn
* Facebook
* Instagram
* YouTube
* Keys of Prosperity Website

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1: Welcome to Don’t Eat Your Young, a nursing podcast with your host Beth Quaas. Before we get started, we have a few quick notes. Don’t Eat Your Young is a listener supported podcast. To learn more about becoming a member and the perks available to you for becoming a patron yourself, visit patreon.com/donteatyouryoung. You can learn more about the show, share your story to join Beth as a guest, or connect with our wonderful community in our Facebook group. You can find all those links and more at donteatyouryoung.com, and now on with the show.

Beth Quaas: Welcome back to Don’t Eat Your Young, everyone. Today, I’m so excited to have Tessa Hayman on the podcast. She’s an RN. She lives near Toronto, Canada. So, we have an international flare today, and I’m so excited to have her on the show. I spoke with her and she’s got such an amazing gift of what she wants to convey to nurses and not just our profession, but many other things. So, welcome Tessa. How are you today?

Tessa Hayman: I’m fantastic. Thank you so much for having me on the show. I really appreciate this opportunity to share.

Beth Quaas: Absolutely, we’re going to talk about a lot of things today, but first tell us a little bit about yourself.

Tessa Hayman: I am a registered nurse and I have a specialty in palliative care, and it was working with individuals at the end of their life across all ages, and cancer was the most common, but there were many, many reasons why people were palliative, and really getting to understand what their regrets were, what they resented, what they loved, what they privileged, what they wished they had more of. And over the years, those experiences really were something I wanted to continue supporting and utilizing. And so, when I burnt out from bedside nursing, I had to figure out what I wanted to do, where I wanted to put my energy, and how I was going to support myself at the same time.

Tessa Hayman: So, one of the things that I loved most about my palliative population was that I got to share with them tips and strategies and their families that really helped them to maximize the life that they had left and enjoy it, and their family members put into practice things that I would share with them, and they would have impact in their life, even beyond the actual patient. So, the impact of not only improving your patient’s life or helping them to feel better through their day, was also spreading to their families and their loved ones.

Beth Quaas: What an important job and what an important time of life to help those people live a great life.

Tessa Hayman: Exactly, but I really wanted to get in sooner. Over and over and over seeing all of the things that people wanted to do differently, I wanted to harness that and bring that sooner and kind of flip my role on its head instead of being there at the end, being there, okay, this is what’s going to be waiting for you. I know it, I’ve been there. I’ll share my experience, but let’s help you have a different end result. I wanted to help people make those changes and have that impact much, much sooner in people’s lives and in their careers.

Tessa Hayman: And, it really got me looking at, why did I want to walk away from bedside? What caused me to leave bedside and how do I help stop that from happening to other people? And so, I had thought it was anxiety. I had a chronic anxiety problem. I ended up… Here in Canada, it’s not easy to get into a CBT or a DBT, which is the gold standard recommendation for those types of issues. So, it was about a six to 12 month waiting list for me to get into a class that was provided by my family doctor.

Beth Quaas: And, what is that? What does CBD mean?

Tessa Hayman: It’s cognitive behavioral therapy and dialectical behavioral therapy. And here in Canada, you have to have an anxiety diagnosis to get into cognitive behavioral therapy, number one. So, you can’t just have a little bit of anxiety and wants some help. You have to actually have a problem already before they’ll give you support. And, then you have dialectical behavioral therapy, which here you cannot get into unless you have a diagnosed personality problem with very few exceptions. So, they made an exception for me because I had had friends who had borderline personality disorder who’d gone through it and told me some of the practices. And I was like, "Oh, I think that would help me. I want to learn." So, I convinced my doctor to let me take it, and both of these programs were very helpful and I was angry after I did them that A, they weren’t available to medical professionals, and B they weren’t available to more of the public. I understand the funding part, but our class was half empty.

Beth Quaas: Wow.

Tessa Hayman: And, we started with a class of 40 and we ended with a class of like 17. So, people dropped off so fast and it was only a 12 week program. Both of them were 12 week programs. I had to wait six months to get into the CBT program, and another six months before I was able to get into the DBT program, and they had both been submitted at the same time, those applications.

Beth Quaas: Wow.

Tessa Hayman: So I was like, all of those things… There was so much judgment and shame for me as a nurse feeling like I should have known all this stuff. I should have known all of these mental health, deep, psychological challenges that are programmed into us from an early age in life, that are programmed into us again through school, that are programmed even deeper and faster and stronger when we go to university, especially if you’re in a medical field and things that psychologists spend a decade of their life trying to understand, so that they can help other people.

Beth Quaas: Right.

Tessa Hayman: And so, I had all of this perception that like, "Oh, I should have already known how to fix my own problem. I should never have burnt out in the first place." All this stuff that I had to work through. Talk about an onion of a problem, the layers that I had to go through to really start deprogramming, and you and I talked about this a little bit before, in the sense of when I was feeling burnt out, there was a lot of feeling helpless.

Beth Quaas: Yes.

Tessa Hayman: Helpless to have any control over my schedule, helpless to have any choice in the tasks I did day to day because I was a community nurse at the time, and in community, I couldn’t just have palliative patients, which was what my specialty was and what I enjoyed doing. I wasn’t able to just do that. I had to do all the wound care, the catheters, the NG tubes and medication of just randomly going to people’s houses and helping them take their insulin because their family member refuses to learn how to do it, refuses to improve, things like that that were very frustrating.

Tessa Hayman: There was 50% of my job that I really didn’t like. At least half of those tasks I dreaded having to do. So, I probably wasn’t in a role that was actually right for me in bedside. And so, I felt really a lot of helplessness over that, and just as a side point before I continue, the fact is that the majority of medical professionals, especially nurses after they graduate, is they go into the first available job, most cases. There’s exceptions of course, but they go into the first available job, which is oftentimes after their last placement they might get a job offer or they’ll go where they get a recommendation from family or friends, but very few of us actually look at the tasks that are going to be required in that job and know whether it’s something we would even enjoy doing. And you’ve had, at this point, most cases, two to four years of clinical experience to kind of give an idea of what tasks you enjoy and which ones you don’t.

Beth Quaas: Right.

Tessa Hayman: And, there are so many different types of nursing jobs that someone could have. If you’re listening to this and you hate the tasks that you have to do, aside from all the other stuff that comes with the job, but the day to day tasks, 80% of the tasks you have to do, if you hate them, you’re probably in the wrong role for you.

Beth Quaas: Oh, I’m glad you said that because people need to know you can leave. You can find something else.

Tessa Hayman: You can leave, and don’t be afraid to explore. I badly wanted to get into ER when I graduated, and unfortunately where I live in this city, most of the ERs have a strict, no new grad policy in critical care areas, which sucks because then you’re trapped on a med surg floor where you don’t want… I did not want to be in med surg, and it was the only thing I really could have done before they would let me get into the ICU or the ER. So as a result, I was miserable at the time I worked in the hospital because I worked on all the floors I didn’t want to work on, doing all the jobs I didn’t want to do. I worked in med surg. I worked in a rehab. I worked in neuro ortho, which was the most challenging floor, half of their full-time staff were on injury leave because they didn’t staff properly.

Tessa Hayman: So, I get it when people are like, staffing problems. I understand that to a T and the reason I went to community because at least 50% of the tasks were something I enjoyed. My experience and client experience to me is you have to enjoy basically a minimum of 70%, and that’s really borderline. 70% of the day to day tasks that you do, you have to enjoy to a degree. If you’re miserable with majority of your tasks, find a new position, find a new role where the tasks or the population is different because sometimes that’s all the difference.

Beth Quaas: I agree because our patients sense that. They can tell if you hate being there and you don’t want to take care of them, then they shut down, and I completely agree with that.

Tessa Hayman: So, when I’m helping nurses with burnout because that’s what I do as a burnout recovery coach now, that’s what I transitioned into, and that’s how I figured out going through that anxiety class and going through and realizing it wasn’t anxiety, it was actually burnout as I did those classes and I was like, "Okay, well this is great and this helped the anxiety, but all the other things were still there." It was something I had to reflect back. I couldn’t recognize it while I was in it because I was on my own and I was trying to figure it out all on my own thinking I had to.

Beth Quaas: Talk about some of those things that people should be attuned to. What should they be feeling in their body if they’re getting to a point? Where should they start listening?

Tessa Hayman: Well, number one, I was exhausted all the time, even though I was getting decent sleep because I don’t have children. So, that was a saving grace for me. I still wasn’t sleeping great. I had all this anxiety and worries and tension. Some of the work was very physically laboring when I was in the hospital. It was less so when I moved to community, it was much more mentally taxing in the community. And so, that was kind of the trade off, but I was just mentally, emotionally, physically exhausted, and I would wake up in the morning still tired because I didn’t know how to get good quality sleep at the time. So, I would wake up still tired and I would dread going to work. I would hit the snooze button until the last moment where I absolutely had to get up and get going. And even then, I would try to push some patient early appointments and try to delay if I could. Once if you work in the hospital, you don’t have a luxury at all of doing.

Beth Quaas: No.

Tessa Hayman: And so, it was tough. So, I dreaded going to work. I had so many racing thoughts and a lot of anxiousness and feeling this constant source of pressure that I always had to do it alone, I had to always put in extra time. I felt bad every time I said no to any kind of overtime because I felt like I was causing pain to my fellow co-workers, and there were patients that needed me and I couldn’t let go of that. So, feeling like you have to do it all alone or feeling like if you don’t show up the rest of the floor is going to collapse or your patients are going to end up in the ER or they’re going to code or whatever else that’s thinking was a big factor in the burnout as well as feeling like I didn’t really matter, like I was dispensable.

Beth Quaas: Right.

Tessa Hayman: You have that cross like, "Oh, if I don’t show up it’s going to be a disaster for everybody else." But, at the same time I’m dispensable and what I’m doing day to day doesn’t really make that much of a difference. Am I really impacting lives? Especially when you see someone once and you may never see them again for a wound care or if you work in the ER and the patients go up to the floor, you never hear about them again, you don’t know what happened to them. So, there was this overall feeling of like, am I really making an impact?

Beth Quaas: Right.

Tessa Hayman: I’m caring for these people in the moment, but even though there’s that thing, people remember those that cared for them before they remember what you do. Even that didn’t feel true.

Beth Quaas: Absolutely.

Tessa Hayman: Because even if I did make them feel something, I wasn’t getting that appreciation feedback loop that I was expecting, and I think many of us expect. And so, I didn’t feel appreciated. I felt dispensable. I felt that I wasn’t taking care of myself. So, I felt exhausted all the time, and I had all this worry and racing thoughts and overwhelm and anxiousness that was constantly part of the… And, I just thought that was part of healthcare. I just thought that’s what it was being a nurse.

Beth Quaas: And, it’s kind of being normalized right now. We’re being asked to do more and we do feel guilty if we don’t pick up the extra hours, and I agree, it’s time that we need to start listening to ourselves, listening to our bodies and do something that can change that because burnout is becoming all too prevalent.

Tessa Hayman: And, all of that feeds back into what I mentioned earlier, which is helpless.

Beth Quaas: Yes.

Tessa Hayman: I felt helpless to really change my circumstances, and I just believed that that is the way healthcare is. There’s nothing I can do about it, and so there’s no point, and I essentially went from full time, to casual, to walking away. Now, that happened over years and I was able to put other things in place, but it was very, very challenging. The fact is most people don’t want leave their healthcare career.

Beth Quaas: Right.

Tessa Hayman: Even though we’re seeing that in a mass exodus from healthcare right now, which is so sad because it’s one of the most needed fields and the most, I think, from a bureaucratic level, one of the most unappreciated.

Beth Quaas: I completely agree.

Tessa Hayman: Yes.

Beth Quaas: People aren’t going to stay at a job where they’re not appreciated and recognized for the hard work we do, and truly it’s hard to get through nursing school and you put all that time and money into it, and I can agree people, they don’t want to walk away, but sometimes it’s necessary.

Tessa Hayman: And, I think a lot of the problems starts in the education. Like I said before, we are very well conditioned in our two to four years. If you look at the military, most military trainings are 12 to 16 weeks, and they will take an 18 year old recruit who has no experience, and in less than four months teach them to walk right in front of a speeding bullet. And, they do that through intense conditioning. If they’re able to do that in just four months, what do you think the system did to you in two to four years? You have been programmed to feel the way you do essentially. You’ve been programmed to feel guilty if you don’t go in because that’s how they keep you coming back in. You’ve been programmed to think you’ve got to do it all alone and be tough because you need to function under pressure and under stress.

Tessa Hayman: And so, there is a little bit of that that may be necessary in training your stress response and training you how to stay cool when crisis is happening, but the rest of it, that clinical detachment, that is not helpful.

Beth Quaas: And, it’s not real.

Tessa Hayman: That is a programming that has-

Beth Quaas: Not realistic.

Tessa Hayman: It’s not service, and it’s not real, and it’s not what patients want. Patients don’t want a robot caring for them. They want someone they can connect with, someone who they feel understands them and is going to support them in the worst moments of their life because that’s [crosstalk 00:18:22] what it is.

Beth Quaas: I can remember patients I’ve taken care of 25 plus years ago and how I felt and how they must have felt, and those things don’t go away. You can’t detach.

Tessa Hayman: No, and to be fair, if you were able to, you would probably be a psychopath or a sociopath because that’s how we define them. So they want us in a way, the thing that many educations say, oh, professional boundary and discipline, and there is appropriate emotional boundaries.

Beth Quaas: Yes.

Tessa Hayman: There is appropriate emotional boundaries, but that picture of the detached clinician that we are taught really to be very much like is utter bull poop.

Beth Quaas: I agree.

Tessa Hayman: And, it causes us more damage because we feel like we can’t make that… The whole entire meaningful and fulfilling part of nursing is taken away by telling you, you have to be clinically detached. And, that is essentially a failure coping mechanism because it doesn’t work that we are supposed to be able to cope with all of the emotional onslaught we deal with on a day to day basis.

Beth Quaas: You know this, it’s not just nurses, it’s all healthcare providers, it’s policemen, it’s firemen, it’s the EMTs that are the first people on the scene, those patients you take care of you don’t forget some of them. And, who’s taking care of the caregivers?

Tessa Hayman: Exactly, the caregivers are being left away. So, we have this conditioning that begins in school, and after all that time, you wonder why you’re working now and feeling like you want to fall apart, which for a lot, especially now, burnout was a… We had a burnout rate of 200% before the pandemic. That means that every single nurse… And, this is for nursing specifically, every single nurse through their career will experience burnout a minimum of twice on average. That’s what that number represents.

Beth Quaas: Wow.

Tessa Hayman: Can you imagine what it is now?

Beth Quaas: No, I can’t.

Tessa Hayman: And so, it’s pretty crazy that we are actually not taught how to deal with the emotion that we face every day, and we are not taught how to really cope in a healthy way. They don’t teach you how to cope in school. So, you get to the floor, and if you weren’t lucky enough to be taught this by your parents or your mentors or somebody else randomly along the way, you’re working as a nurse without any real coping skills on how to emotionally deal with all of the things you face on a day to day basis and wondering why you can’t figure it all out.

Tessa Hayman: Well, you weren’t born knowing at all. Every tiny little thing in your life you learn from observation of someone or something, or you were directly taught by something or someone. So, the fact that you may go through your career feeling like you should know how to handle every problem that comes along the way and beating yourself up when you can’t, because burnout’s not a problem, ladies and gentlemen, it’s not a problem you can solve, and you’re bashing your head against the wall trying to solve something that can’t be solved and wondering why you feel like a failure because all it does is make you feel like you’re not good enough, that you can’t figure this out, you can’t figure out how to feel better, you can’t figure out how to get more sleep, you can’t figure out how to control your thoughts. Well, that’s when you have to reach out for help. You have to be taught by somebody else who’s done it, who’s been there.

Beth Quaas: And, there comes you. So, tell us a little bit about what you are doing now with your business and what you offer.

Tessa Hayman: So, we have a structure that we do because we have learned through our own research that most people experience greater results and greater success through group programs because you are able to learn not only from your own experience, but everybody else who’s sharing, and while majority of our clients are nurses, we do provide support to all health professionals, anybody who’s in healthcare because I feel like there isn’t enough collaboration. We don’t have in our schooling, in our education, in our clinical practice, enough interprofessional collaboration in my personal opinion. And so, I really wanted to bring that in when started this kind of coaching because there’s so much we can learn from each other.

Tessa Hayman: We work together every single day together. If you are a nurse, you’re working with the doctors, you’re working with the pharmacist, you’re working with the physiotherapists, the respiratory therapists, you’re working with the people in the labs bringing your patients down, or providing them with report back and forth when you’re sending a patient for tests. If you’re in the community, you’re speaking with all these different social workers, psychologists, you’re speaking with people who are doing care coordinating, which are often if you’re in the public, if you’re in community care, you’re dealing with case managers and there’s a lot of different moving pieces and none of us really talk to each other.

Beth Quaas: I agree.

Tessa Hayman: We all have our own little societies, our own organizations, our own little councils, our own little everything. And as a result, the growth that we individually make doesn’t get shared.

Beth Quaas: That’s a great point.

Tessa Hayman: There are other professions who don’t burn out as high rates as nurses and doctors. Why is that?

Beth Quaas: Why do you think that is?

Tessa Hayman: Why aren’t we learning from each other? Why aren’t we pulling some of these things across? For example, physiotherapists have the lowest rate of burnout. Not that they don’t, I’m talking about percent, very minute percentage points. I think they’re at like 30, or I think… Sorry, I think it’s like 28% for physiotherapists and if you’re going to check this out for yourself, there’s about 20 different reports. So, I looked at a number and I took an average. That’s how I got my numbers, and so 28% for physiotherapists and I think it’s about 35% for nurses, 34 point something.

Beth Quaas: What do you attribute that to?

Tessa Hayman: And, I think that is a combination of many people who are physiotherapists. It depends on where you got your education. Here in Canada, or in Ontario specifically, physiotherapy is only a master’s degree, whereas some states, some provinces, it’s a degree in itself. So, it depends, but a lot of people who go into physiotherapy have a degree in kinesiology or physical sciences or biology, or some of them even nursing. But they tend to have, I think, they’re more in tune with their body. They had physically healthy habits prior to going into a physiotherapy career.

Tessa Hayman: These individuals are more likely statistically to be going to the gym, to be paying attention to what they eat, to be practicing things like yoga or mindfulness or meditation, which all help us to handle stress and we know physical exercise can be very stress releasing. From what I’ve seen, that they come with that background, and so those practices are already in place by the time they hit the job market.

Beth Quaas: That’s very interesting.

Tessa Hayman: Whereas nurses are known to be the most unhealthy health profession, stamp nurses, and we wonder why we have the highest rate of burnout. Second place would be doctors. It’s because there’s more of us than them.

Beth Quaas: Yep.

Tessa Hayman: And when we start in our programs, the first place we start is your relationship with yourself because your relationship with your job, your relationship with your family, your relationship with money or time or anything else really is going to come second. If you are not good with you, nothing else in your life is going to get where you really want it to be because you there’s a saying in business that I learned is the owner is the biggest bottleneck of their own business.

Beth Quaas: Right.

Tessa Hayman: But, the same is true for our life. You are the biggest bottleneck to anything that you want in life. And so, that’s where we start and we have two programs that we run. We very rarely do one-on-one coaching because all of our programs include one-on-one coaching, but they also provide the group aspect, which is found to be the most successful way to get people results, and here it’s not about talk therapy, it’s results. What are you facing? And, what do you want to change? And, let’s get you there, to put a really simple spin on it. But, it’s so it’s so important, and then once you’ve really looked at that relationship with yourself, then we can look at all of the other things that are impacting the way you’re feeling, that are impacting your life. So, you’re talking about more of what we do and there it is.

Beth Quaas: That is such important work. I know so many people that have all of the symptoms of burnout that you talked about. I’ve been there myself. I had to walk away from my job up and try something new, and I tell you, just like you tell people, if you don’t really love what you’re doing, don’t stay there, and I can’t agree more. Don’t stay, life is too short to continue to do something because of fear. There’s always something out there for you to do.

Tessa Hayman: The great thing about our programs on that front is that out of all of the people that come in, and the reason we chose 60 days is because it’s a short enough period of time that you can see results really, really quickly, but in a long enough period of time for us to really create an impact, and then the 12 month program is really all about helping you to implement all the things you’ve learned in the 60 day, and we even give people who join the 12 month program, they get the 60 day included.

Beth Quaas: Oh, that’s amazing.

Tessa Hayman: But, they have to go through it on their own if they do it that way. So, we always recommend doing the 60 day program first, seeing where you’re at, and then graduating into the 12 month program so to speak.

Beth Quaas: So, where do people find you?

Tessa Hayman: They can find me online through Facebook or Instagram, or you can contact us through our website keysofprosperity.com. We have a private Facebook book group for health professionals. It’s a health professional support group, and we provide a weekly show where we provide tips and strategies and supports for individuals in that group, and we are actually in the process of migrating that to our YouTube channel, so people will be able to watch those episodes for those who are like no Facebook, they’ll still be able to find us, and when people work with us, of the people that come in, about 70% are able to stay in their position after working with us.

Beth Quaas: Oh, that’s amazing.

Tessa Hayman: About 70% are able to really change their life without actually having to change their job, and about 30% we end up supporting them to find a new position because wherever they are is not right for them, or it’s not a good environment or a number of things can come up.

Beth Quaas: That is exactly what I want nurses to hear because one of my goals is to have nurses stay in nursing if they can and choose to because I don’t want so many people to leave because they worked hard to get there, and that knowledge is so important. So, I’m so thankful for what you’re doing in helping people to stay or to find the courage to leave if that’s what’s best for them.

Tessa Hayman: And if they leave, where are you going to go? What do you want to do? Helping them to figure all of that out is a part of what we have to provide because so many will go and if you’ve been in this situation and you’ve been burnt out, you’ve left your job to go to a new job, and then you wonder why after the first 30 and 60 days the excitement wears off in the new job, you feel burnt out again. What’s that saying? From the pan to the fire. Nobody’s taught us how to look for a job, how to actually be the one interviewing the employer rather than the employer interviewing you, how to actually manage your manager rather than always being the subject of management.

Tessa Hayman: And, those are very key, important things to enjoy in your job that never are taught in nursing school, and if you were taught at a nursing school, by all means, share your program because I’ll recommend that one because there are so many things we weren’t taught, and one of the untalked about things in this world is money.

Beth Quaas: Right.

Tessa Hayman: And, just some last thoughts is that we include a component of that in our program because it’s not something you’re taught in school. Unless your parents were fantastic at money, which considering 80% of households are financially struggling, they’re about two months away from not being able to pay their bills, that’s not a great statistic. So, even though you’re a nurse and you’re probably making a decent amount of money, you may not be living in such a manner to enjoy that income. If you’re working extra overtime and that’s going to be contributing to your burnout because you need to do that to pay the bills. Well, what if you financially optimize, maybe you don’t need to work any overtime.

Beth Quaas: Right.

Tessa Hayman: So, that’s one of the benefits and that’s one of the reasons why I chose my partner who is a financial expert and she’s moved into relationship coaching. She’s just the middle of doing her certification for relationship coaching because it’s something she’s done her entire career in finance. You’d be surprised how much of financial coaching is about relationships.

Beth Quaas: Absolutely, well I wish, wish I wish nursing had a pension so that there was the chance to retire at 55 or earlier, but I think trying to work at least in the United States because of the healthcare, they need health insurance and you can’t get it until you’re 65. Nursing’s a very hard profession if you’re working at the bedside and it takes a big physical toll. And so, at some point I hope nurses are recognized for that as well and can retire earlier while they’re still healthy.

Tessa Hayman: I started a saying at the international summit we ran in July to, which is going to be an annual summit, the Burnout Recovery Summit, and one of the things is that when you are in healthcare, you don’t come out intact. You either lose a piece of your soul, a piece of your body, or a piece of your mind by the time you exit, and that’s because we’re not taught how to be whole in healthcare. Talk about holistic care, it doesn’t exist for the care provider because we’re never taught. You need to be taught how to holistically care for yourself for you to do it to others, and none of us were really taught that.

Beth Quaas: No.

Tessa Hayman: At least not in our education, which is unfortunate.

Beth Quaas: I agree. I applaud you for the work that you’re doing. I think it’s amazing, and we’ll have all of your links in our show notes as well, so people can find you. If you were going to leave nurses with few tips or advice, what would you say?

Tessa Hayman: Stop feeling like you’ve got to go it alone and figure this all out. I didn’t do it, nobody else has done it. Nobody who has experienced burnout has recovered alone. So, reach out for help. We offer free discovery calls. So, even if you just want to unload, by all means, book a session. They have the link to book a free session just to see what’s possible for yourself. You might be amazed what kind of change you can feel in just a 30 minute session.

Beth Quaas: That’s an amazing offer and I encourage anyone to please take her up on that. Give Tessa a call and see if you can get some help. I thank you so much for being on the show, Tessa. You’re doing amazing work. I hope this spurs more people to seek you out.

Tessa Hayman: Thank you. I really appreciate it, Beth. Thank you so much for having me here on the show. It’s been awesome.

Speaker 1: Don’t Eat Your Young was produced in partnership with True Story FM, engineering by Andy Nelson, music by The Lighthearts. Find the show, show notes, and transcripts at donteatyouryoung.com. If your podcast app allows ratings and reviews, please, consider doing that for our show, but the best thing you can do to support the show is share it with a friend or colleague. Thank you for listening.

Stories from the Incredible World of Nursing.

Welcome to Don’t Eat Your Young, the podcast that brings you stories from the trenches of the incredible, wonderful, exhausting, terrifying, joyous world of nursing with your host, Beth Quaas.