Iron Man 2

Here’s some helpful tips how to deal with party problems so your friends don’t fall like Tony. We find out why Natalie is missing while our hero goes to the bathroom. In. The. Suit. Pepper tries but she’s still a bad friend. Kyle also has a brilliant drunk Tony impression.

What’s the connection between 1940’s radio hosts and Tony’s final birthday party? And what’s the deal with Rhodey’s car? We also pay our respects to Adam Michael Goldstein, known as DJ AM, who makes a big impact in this minute.

We pour up a course in mixology as we purvey a perfectly innocent conversation between two adults. That is if you overlook the Swiss watches, dirty martinis and masterful mind games being played on our hero. What is Natalie Rushman’s job again?

Hammer has a plan for Pentagon domination and using Tony’s frontward as a bathroom while Ivan has plans for the latter. We then head back to Tony’s bedroom and his conch is literally just right out in the open. All conchs are welcome!

Let’s begin with a really nerdy dive into the world of encryption, operating systems and have a call back to season two of the Marvel Movie Minute! Why? Ivan, our physicist turned hacker shows up poor Justin and his lacking knowledge of technology. Also, no attempt has been made to change Ivan’s appearance though we have to ask who’s his stylist?

It’s rash time, everybody. We don’t want to talk about blood poisoning. But we do it. For the kids. Everything is breaking this week: Tony, the arc reactor, their friendship, the works. Meanwhile, back in Queens, it’s Hammer time. We head into Justin’s factory littered with Space-X employees and Ivan’s new digs.

Don Cheadle is epic being epic! They’re rolling tanks up the PCH! PIVOT! As exciting as Tony getting chewed out may be, watching Tony take the emotional hit is a highlight of this sequence. CGI wonder-work in the palladium core and no, it probably shouldn’t be smoking.

Christiane Amanpour has a corner on the “twos.” There is, in no way, instruction on extending the float time of checks in this episode. Rhodey has access codes. Pepper is getting interviewed. Tony is in the car. Jarvis is in exposition mode. And thank goodness, too, because how else would we know how corrupt we all are?

What would it be like to be approached by a benefactor? A venture capitalist of evil? We explore these opportunities this week. We don’t speak Russian, but we pretend do thanks to Rourke and Favreau. And along the way, we dive deep into our friend the bird, the importance of the bird to negotiation, and language as a power move. Finally, a discourse into appropriate pop culture metaphors in a dance between Peanuts and Buffalo Bill.

Introducing the Blend Friend. You will not thank us for this. Back in the minutes, it’s monologue time. It’s the juicy-juicy Sam Rockwell 2-camera Hammer-Ivan talk. All this reminds us how important therapy with your father is, and how much we miss not knowing about “Daddy Hammer.” What we DO know is that Justin sees Ivan’s power over dinner and chocolate and they are awakened to the value of Legacy.