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How to Split a Toaster episode 623

Co-Parenting During the Holidays

‘Tis the Season… for Co-Parenting Conflict!

No parent wants to deal with emergency motion handling orders or duty judges on the holidays, but it happens. Stress can be high and the holidays – any holiday – can become a ripe place to pick a fight. So how do you avoid conflict to make the holidays still a special time for the kids?

The key is to do everything you can to avoid problems. Often, that means getting your ego out of the way so that you and your ex can make it about the kids. Avoid exchanges on travel days. Try to not split actual holidays, but if you have to, think about the activities of the day and plan accordingly. (In other words, if you’re splitting Christmas, do it in the afternoon so they can enjoy Christmas morning.) And do what you can to avoid escalation – perhaps you need to stay away from the eggnog until after you’ve dropped the kids off.

What about gifts? The kids were used to getting gifts from both parents. You don’t have to stop co-gifting just because you’re divorced. It may be what your child needs to feel safe around the holiday.

Seth and Pete offer lots of great advice. Tune in, and have yourself a happy and safe holiday season.

Seth Nelson is a Tampa based family lawyer known for devising creative solutions to difficult problems. In How to Split a Toaster, Nelson and co-host Pete Wright take on the challenge of divorce with a central objective — saving your most important relationships with your family, your former spouse, and yourself.