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Why Connection Is So Important in High Conflict Interactions
One of the cornerstones of successful management of high conflict interactions is connection. In fact, it is the “C” in the CARS Method®—a set of principles for managing high conflict disputes and interactions.
In today’s episode, Megan and Bill talk about this exceedingly important principle of connection, including:
- why connection is foundational to successful interactions with high conflict people
- the brain’s request for connection
- why it is so difficult to remember to connect before problem-solving
- the impact of connecting—using EAR Statements
- whether connection and EAR Statements can be over-used
LINKS
- BOOKS
- ARTICLES
- Our website: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/
- Submit a Question for Bill and Megan
- All of our books can be found in our online store or anywhere books are sold, including as e-books.
- You can also find these show notes at our site as well.
Note: We are not diagnosing anyone in our discussions, merely discussing patterns of behavior.
- (00:00) – Welcome to It’s All Your Fault
- (01:21) – Intro to Connection
- (02:22) – Foundational to Successful Interactions
- (04:14) – Connection vs. Isolation
- (05:17) – Connecting with an HCP
- (08:18) – How the Brain’s Involved
- (13:44) – Hostility Bias
- (15:00) – Misreading Cues
- (17:56) – Difference in Cultures
- (19:37) – Remember to Connect First
- (24:36) – EAR Statements
- (26:44) – Can You Overdo It?
- (29:53) – Wrap Up
- (30:24) – Reminders
Further Listening
Each week, Bill Eddy and Megan Hunter will be exploring the five types of people who can ruin your life — people with high conflict personalities — and how they weave themselves into our lives in romance, at work, next door, at school, places of worship, and just about everywhere, causing chaos, exhaustion, and dread for everyone else.
Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.
Bill Eddy is HCI’s co-founder and Chief Innovation Officer. He pioneered the High Conflict Personality Theory (HCP) and is viewed globally as the leading expert on managing disputes involving people with high conflict personalities.
Megan Hunter, MBA
Megan Hunter is HCI’s co-founder and Chief Executive Officer. Within her role at HCI, she also serves as a leading expert in high conflict personalities in all settings, focusing primarily on the workplace, customer service, government/public service, ombuds, and religious organizations. Her degrees in business and economics combined with her years of experience in the legal arena are a valuable blend for many conflict settings.
Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.
Bill Eddy is HCI’s co-founder and Chief Innovation Officer. He pioneered the High Conflict Personality Theory (HCP) and is viewed globally as the leading expert on managing disputes involving people with high conflict personalities.
Megan Hunter, MBA
Megan Hunter is HCI’s co-founder and Chief Executive Officer. Within her role at HCI, she also serves as a leading expert in high conflict personalities in all settings, focusing primarily on the workplace, customer service, government/public service, ombuds, and religious organizations. Her degrees in business and economics combined with her years of experience in the legal arena are a valuable blend for many conflict settings.