What happens when you take the most toyetic franchise of the 1980s, hand it to the kings of schlock at Cannon Films, and tell them to make the next Star Wars? You get Masters of the Universe—a movie so gloriously confused that it can’t decide if it’s fantasy, sci-fi, or just an over-extended toy commercial. Mandy Kaplan is joined by returning guest Krissy Lenz and first-time guest Nathan Blackwell to revisit Dolph Lundgren’s He-Man, Frank Langella’s unexpectedly Shakespearean Skeletor, and Courtney Cox’s denim-skirted grief arc.
Krissy admits she was more of a She-Ra kid than a He-Man fan, Nathan reveals how his early nerd DNA was written by toy catalogues and VHS rentals, and Mandy discovers that her new haircut may have made her look more Eternia than she ever bargained for. Together, they marvel at Billy Barty’s sweaty “space gnome” Gwildor, dissect the bizarre mashup of swords and laser guns, and debate whether Dolph Lundgren’s dubbed dialogue or Evil-Lyn’s parenting-by-imitation scam is the bigger cinematic crime.
And of course, Frank Langella steals the show as Skeletor—chewing scenery, rewriting dialogue, and turning what should’ve been a paycheck gig into one of the greatest villain performances of the decade. It’s camp, it’s chaos, it’s nostalgia, and it’s a reminder that sometimes the best way to watch a movie is with tacos, two beers, and friends who know how to laugh at laser-pew-pews projected from a rainbow mist.
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